Selling a home is perhaps one of the most uncomfortable, inconvenient, energy draining and grueling experiences you will undertake on your own. It's one thing to be put in an uncomfortable position for a minute or two, or have a run-in with a co-worker or friend that has you anxious and sleepless for a few days, but selling your home, especially on your own is a complete and prolonged lifestyle change. Know that when you put your home on the market, you're opening your door, your family and your life to strangers - strangers close enough to find your sign or see your ad in the local newspaper.

Realtors are at the top of the list when it comes to assault victims. We talk to strangers every single day, drive them around in our cars and open our personal time and our lives to serving them during the process of the search for a home. I personally take these measures when meeting strangers and I responsibly ensure my own safety as well as my client's homes and personal possessions.

It's imperative that you take necessary precautions to ensure your personal - and legal safety when selling your home. If you have family members that may be present during showings please share this information with them. Outline specific guidelines and make sure everyone understands the importance of each one.

Never display your home phone number on your sign
Use a number other than your home number. A cellular phone number or office voice mail number is preferable to your home number. This is important for two reasons. First, if you have children in the home you don't want them running into a stranger on the phone that wants to come to your door while you're not home. Second, you need to set boundaries and limitations for strangers. Some will assume they can call the number anytime since you're trying to sell and won't hesitate to call in the middle of the night. Realtors that have their own home numbers on business cards experience this dilemma often. You'll need to check your voice mail frequently to ensure that you capture and hold your buyer's interest.

Investigate before calling back
When a prospective buyer leaves a message with his phone number and name, be sure to cross check the phone number and name, and be sure to check the list of sexual predators with your local sheriff's department. This is public information. A few minutes might save someone a lifetime of trauma.

When you call back
Qualify him before arranging a personal visit. Ask at least five questions and listen to his answers. How did you find my home? What about it interests you? Have you been looking in this area for awhile? Have you talked with a lender? Are you working with a realtor? Do you work close? Where? What do you do there? Do you live close? What's bringing you to this area? It may sound intrusive, but this is accomplishing two tasks at the same time. First, you're establishing a rapport with this person and second, you're opening your home - you should know who you're opening it to.

Pets
During your phone call and if you have pets in your home, be sure to ask if your visitor has any pet allergies. If so, be honest and upfront and state that you have a dog or cat (or both) and ask if that will be a problem. Most likely it will not, however this will avoid surprise and discomfort later. Make sure your animal is locked up in a cage or make arrangements to have the animal elsewhere during the showing.

Schedule an appointment
Have your schedule handy when you call back. Avoid the embarrassment of double-booking yourself and have the advantage of knowing what your schedule is at the time of your callback. This asserts that you are busy, your life is controlled and you are firm with your plans. In reality, many buyers not working with realtors are browsers and often not extremely motivated or ready to confidently proceed with a purchase. They delay or often fail to show up at all. You'll have to find the common denominator between being available 100% of the time and being in control 100% of the time.

Set an expectation during your appointment
This includes a timeframe and who's coming to the showing. There's nothing wrong with making up an imaginary appointment immediately preceding and following this appointment, and letting him assume that someone will be present with you. This sets an expectation that the visitor will show up on time and that you won't be alone for long. Verbiage such as "okay then, we have a 2:00 and a 5:30 showing, so this would be a perfect time to come by. We'll see you at 4:30 this Saturday and that will give you about a half an hour. Will anyone else be accompanying you? Great. We look forward to seeing you at 4:30."

Write it down and share it
Keep a registry of visitors. Write down their first and last name, their phone number and notes you've gathered during your conversation. You don't need to display this, but keep a record for yourself. Let a friend, family member or neighbor know who is expected and when. Be sure to also write down callers that you've talked to but that won't be visiting and why. This is important in order to avoid any complicating accusations of discrimination.

Use a buddy system
We tell our children to do it and so should we. If at all possible, have another adult present for the showing.

Children
I strongly encourage anyone with small children showing their homes themselves to make arrangements for someone to watch the kids during this time. This will limit their contact with strangers and avoid distractions and interruptions during this time allowing you to focus on the visitor. Also, make sure that children's rooms are secure by locking the windows. Just by looking, a visitor can tell if windows are locked and if they're not, this is a piece of information a stranger doesn't need.

Secure all valuables
Do a quick check of your home to be sure you've hidden away all valuables including jewelry/jewelry boxes, personal photographs, cameras and expensive collectibles. Remove all bills, credit card statements, travel agendas, personal mail and address books from view. Put them in a file cabinet or drawer instead of a pantry or closet. Buyers might want to see inside the closets and built-in shelving.

Greet him at the front door
You're conditioned to use your side or back door entrance, however, greet your prospective buyer at your front door. This gives a better presentation of your home, as well as keeping you away from stairs and narrow landings that trap you into small spaces.

Follow, do not lead
Step outside of your home when greeting this person. Specifically stand outside, greet him with a firm handshake and eye contact and gesture him inwards with the same hand that you shook his hand with. Never outstretch both arms at the same time. When inside, keep close eye contact on all movements and stay three steps behind (enough to avoid a turnaround and lunging contact). Avoid following his hand gestures and getting momentarily distracted, for example if he stands beside, points and looks upward to the ceiling, step back and note his concern (ceiling damage, etc.) and address it if it all possible without turning your head away from him.

Trust your instincts
Use your own judgment to guide you through the showing. If there's a hint of discomfort, back off. Don't question your instinct and shut out the actual situation while your mind ponders whether or not this is a good idea. Simply back off and if you're more comfortable standing at the end of the hallway rather than following him down toward the bedrooms, do just that. If you get this feeling as soon as you open the door, stay at the door and allow him to tour the home himself (it's a better situation for both parties anyway). This is why it's important to put valuables away prior to any showings.

Never turn your back on your visitor
Stay behind your visitor. If he motions or leads toward something behind you, stand aside and follow. Watch for any hidden movement and stay alert.

Never represent more than you can back up in writing.
If a concern arises, speak the truth very clearly, precisely and without explanation then after the visitor is gone, note the concern and what you said. For instance, if he questions a water stain in the ceiling tile and you know that it was caused by faulty plumbing that was repaired and has not had a problem since, you may state something like "we repaired a leaking pipe last summer but didn't replace the damaged tile - it's in the disclosure form, would you like a copy?"

Keep the showing moving
In the event you have a visitor that seems like they just want to stay awhile and aren't necessarily in the market to buy your home (you'll get a feel), avoid humoring them and becoming their new best friend (unless you're really looking for one). Even if they're the best company you've had in awhile, this is still a stranger. Each minute you spend after you realize they're not particularly interested in buying is another signal that you're open to them stopping by unexpectedly or calling just to "catch up". I've run into a number of lonely people that simply enjoy getting out of the house and finding someone nice to hang out with. When you have a sign in your yard and you're showing your house, they know that at the time they're with you they have your full attention and there's no one more important to you.

You want to be as polite as possible and still end the showing, so make sure that they're ready to leave satisfied. As you're talking with them, keep moving throughout the house, gently gesturing them as you go. Avoid getting stuck in conversation in one room for 20 minutes. When you're through, get the conversation back on track and find out how interested they might be. "Is there something you'd like to see again? Do you have any questions? Will you be seeing any more houses? When were you hoping to make your decision? May I call you this weekend after you've had time to think about it?"

Show them out
Thank them for their time and for stopping by. The best way to get appreciation is to give it. Reaffirm future follow up with them and if possible, make plans. Find out if there's someone else that might want to see the home before they make their decision and try to schedule a time for this before they leave, or at the very least get permission to call to confirm plans with all parties.

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